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Question of the Month

#Question of the Month: a #bloghop to think about. No. 7- Which one social convention would you get rid of?

A little while ago, Michael D’Agostino, of A Life Examined, brought up the idea of a new blog hop called Question of the Month. He thinks blog readers would like to know a little more about us, the bloggers. So we’re all gathering to show you guys who we are by taking part in the Question of the Month blog hop. On the first Monday of each month, we answer the question that gets posted here.

This month’s question is: “Which one social convention would you get rid of?”

It’s been awhile since I’ve given much thought to annoying social conventions. In some ways, the world has changed for the better in that regard. There was once a time I worried about what to wear to church, but so many churches (not all, but many) have truly embraced the “come as you are” mentality that no one is expected to show up in their “Sunday’s Best” unless they want to or it’s a special occasion that calls for it.

While I think it’s silly for me to “dress up” every day for a job that will literally require me to get down on the floor with children, I do actually like to dress up from time to time. I just don’t like being told I need to. How I dress doesn’t really affect my ability to do my job unless I happen to be wearing a skirt that’s too short to bend over in. If that’s the case, I probably shouldn’t be wearing that at all.

I wonder if hand shaking counts as a social convention. I don’t have a problem with it, but I’ve noticed that people don’t really do it much anymore with introductions unless the setting is formal. Maybe it’s a germ thing or maybe our culture is simply changing. Maybe a man’s handshake isn’t as important as it once was or perhaps it has become so important that people don’t want to squander that moment on casual insignificant intros.

Hugging is where I have a problem. I like to hug people I’m comfortable with, but just because I’m related to someone doesn’t mean I’m comfortable with them. I’m tired of social conventions that state you have to act like you love everyone you’re related to, even when you’ve only just met them. Blood or not, if I don’t know you, I don’t want to hug you.

And why am I expected to give a graduation gift to a cousin’s kid I’ve never met? …

There is one social convention that I’ll keep as long as it’s needed. Business gifts are always uncomfortable to some degree. You know, those gifts you give or get from the people you work with. Just accept the gift, smile, and decide what to do with it later. When you spend as much time with someone as you spend with your co-workers it just seems wrong to not offer some kind of gift for socially accepted holidays, even if it’s just a card. If we’re really honest with ourselves, whether we like it or not, some of us spend more time with our co-workers than we do our families. It would be a bit cold-hearted not to acknowledge them on a significant or mutual day of celebration.

It’s the last month of the BooktagsBlogHop trial period and I hope you’ll consider joining in. It’s a great way to sample a book and get an opinion on it without scouring its list of reviews. Please check it out. BooktagsBlogHop

Also, please visit the other participants in this hop and even join in if you’d like.

Thank you for taking the time to read this post. If you like it let me know and share it with others. See you next time, Toi Thomas. #thetoiboxofwords

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Question of the Month

#Question of the Month: a #bloghop to think about. No. 6- Are you an introvert or an extrovert?

A little while ago, Michael D’Agostino, of A Life Examined, brought up the idea of a new blog hop called Question of the Month. He thinks blog readers would like to know a little more about us, the bloggers. So we’re all gathering to show you guys who we are by taking part in the Question of the Month blog hop. On the first Monday of each month, we answer the question that gets posted here.

This month’s question is: “Are you an introvert or an extrovert?”

Once you enter the world of writing and become part of the writing community at any level, this question will pop up periodically. It’s always been pretty clear that I’m an introvert though I’ve always told people that I’m mildly introverted. For me, I have always felt that being around lots of people to be uncomfortable in varying degrees. When I’m around my huge family, the familiarity helps ground me and I can bear the closeness for a longer periods than I could with strangers. I do much better with smaller crowds and in some cases have even learned to blend into the middle instead of the background.

Pinterest Board Info – sourced from A Cup of Jo blog.

I don’t have a problem speaking to large groups of people in a controlled environment, as long as they are over there and I’m up front, I don’t become overwhelmed. Book signings are difficult for me, but I’ve learned to use my husband and sister as anchors. As long as one of them or another trusted family member or friend is nearby, I can do it. I can’t go to a mall a peak times and hardly ever go to Walmart; there are no non-peak times at Walmart. I can’t do concerts and usually sit and rock back and forth at sporting events, which again if surrounded by family isn’t too bad. I feel like they shield me.

After years of telling people that I’m mildly introverted, I came across an article on the “A Cup of Jo” blog that got me wondering. I read through it carefully and followed along. Turns out, I was right. I was hoping I’d end up being this new term “ambivert”, but no. I’m still a mild introvert or an introvert with one or two extrovert tendencies. At my core, I’m perfectly content to sit at home alone. I don’t feel left out or feel like I’m missing anything. After reading the article, I posted it to Pinterest with my results and it has proven to be one of my most popular pins… Dang, how I wish I could take credit for it. 😉


The first mini tour in my It’s Like the Full Moon, pre-order extravaganza starts today and the kick-off has already been posted over at the Author Promo Co-op blog. Please check it out if you have the time.


I’m trying to start a new bookish blog hop for anyone who might be interested. Last month was our first post and we all had a great time. It’s a great way to sample books and get an opinion on them without scouring their list of reviews. Please check out the BooktagsBlogHop.


Please visit the other participants on this hop and even join in if you’d like.

Thank you for taking the time to read this post. If you like it let me know and share it with others. See you next time, Toi Thomas. #thetoiboxofwords

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About Toi Question of the Month

#Question of the Month: a #bloghop to think about. No. 5- Who would play you in a movie of your life?

A little while ago, Michael D’Agostino, of A Life Examined, brought up the idea of a new blog hop called Question of the Month. He thinks blog readers would like to know a little more about us, the bloggers. So we’re all gathering to show you guys who we are by taking part in the Question of the Month blog hop. On the first Monday of each month, we answer the question that gets posted here.

This month’s question is: “Who would play you in a movie of your life?”

This is actually a question I’ve thought about; not because I’m an egomaniac or anything, but because of a question I often ask other authors when I interview them. On a past blog anniversary, I interviewed myself asking the same question, “Who is so you (or me) and why?”

Of course as time passes by, this question becomes more and more difficult to answer. There are so many new, up and coming, and undiscovered talents out there; should my story ever be told on the big or small screen, I might not even be familiar with the person taking on the role. As long as they are relatively cute (I see myself as relatively cute), have dimples, and brown skin, I’ll be happy…

Although, we may be reaching a level of technological advancements and make-up artistry where anyone could play any role regardless of their natural skin color, but that’s a discussion for another day.

I’m trying to start a new bookish blog hop for anyone who might be interested. Please check it out. BooktagsBlogHop

Please check out the other participants in this hop and even join in if you’d like.

Thank you for taking the time to read this post. If you like it let me know and share it with others. See you next time, Toi Thomas. #thetoiboxofwords