Tag: etiquette

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Question of the Month

#Question of the Month: a #bloghop to think about. No. 7- Which one social convention would you get rid of?

A little while ago, Michael D’Agostino, of A Life Examined, brought up the idea of a new blog hop called Question of the Month. He thinks blog readers would like to know a little more about us, the bloggers. So we’re all gathering to show you guys who we are by taking part in the Question of the Month blog hop. On the first Monday of each month, we answer the question that gets posted here.

This month’s question is: “Which one social convention would you get rid of?”

It’s been awhile since I’ve given much thought to annoying social conventions. In some ways, the world has changed for the better in that regard. There was once a time I worried about what to wear to church, but so many churches (not all, but many) have truly embraced the “come as you are” mentality that no one is expected to show up in their “Sunday’s Best” unless they want to or it’s a special occasion that calls for it.

While I think it’s silly for me to “dress up” every day for a job that will literally require me to get down on the floor with children, I do actually like to dress up from time to time. I just don’t like being told I need to. How I dress doesn’t really affect my ability to do my job unless I happen to be wearing a skirt that’s too short to bend over in. If that’s the case, I probably shouldn’t be wearing that at all.

I wonder if hand shaking counts as a social convention. I don’t have a problem with it, but I’ve noticed that people don’t really do it much anymore with introductions unless the setting is formal. Maybe it’s a germ thing or maybe our culture is simply changing. Maybe a man’s handshake isn’t as important as it once was or perhaps it has become so important that people don’t want to squander that moment on casual insignificant intros.

Hugging is where I have a problem. I like to hug people I’m comfortable with, but just because I’m related to someone doesn’t mean I’m comfortable with them. I’m tired of social conventions that state you have to act like you love everyone you’re related to, even when you’ve only just met them. Blood or not, if I don’t know you, I don’t want to hug you.

And why am I expected to give a graduation gift to a cousin’s kid I’ve never met? …

There is one social convention that I’ll keep as long as it’s needed. Business gifts are always uncomfortable to some degree. You know, those gifts you give or get from the people you work with. Just accept the gift, smile, and decide what to do with it later. When you spend as much time with someone as you spend with your co-workers it just seems wrong to not offer some kind of gift for socially accepted holidays, even if it’s just a card. If we’re really honest with ourselves, whether we like it or not, some of us spend more time with our co-workers than we do our families. It would be a bit cold-hearted not to acknowledge them on a significant or mutual day of celebration.

It’s the last month of the BooktagsBlogHop trial period and I hope you’ll consider joining in. It’s a great way to sample a book and get an opinion on it without scouring its list of reviews. Please check it out. BooktagsBlogHop

Also, please visit the other participants in this hop and even join in if you’d like.

Thank you for taking the time to read this post. If you like it let me know and share it with others. See you next time, Toi Thomas. #thetoiboxofwords

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Books

Review: Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde

The Strange Case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde by Robert Louis Stevenson

I give this book a 4.

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This is a story that most people are familiar with but few have actually read. Being one of those people for so long, I decided to rectify that. I’ve been in a phase of going back and reading many classical and pivotal works of literature, and like so many others, this story did not fail to live up to its reputation.

The first thing one notices upon reading this story is the use of language and the specific style in which the story is written. Stories just aren’t written like this anymore, and though it was an adjustment, I felt somehow draw to this unique quality. This classical style of writing gives this story an edge and a sense of mystery that would otherwise come off as boring or over exaggerated.

The true value of this story comes from the introduction of the duality of man, in which this particular character of Jekyll/Hyde represents. The duality of man wasn’t a new idea at the time this story was written, but this story captures a sense of humanity that is still assessable and applicable today. While instances that truly test the human psyche typically stem from some sort of trauma or moral or metaphysical dilemma, Dr. Jekyll explores the inner reaches of his soul simply because he can, and then there are consequences.

Many times people look at Edward Hyde as a villain, but he was only what Jekyll refused to be and was only able to exist because of Jekyll. After reading this story and understanding it to the best of my ability, I don’t see either of these personas as good or bad, but simply products of necessity.

Would Dr. Jekyll bothered to have sought the personification of this less socially acceptable counterpart had society not been so restrictive and “polite” at the time? Would Hyde have been so wicked if the perception of wickedness had not been so profound, or if his counterpart had been allowed the freedom to experience “wicked” things without the necessity of a transformation?

This story is in many ways a jab at society and the big picture that it paints in the minds of its citizens. Does everything have to boil down to a question of right and wrong, or is there an acceptable gray area of existence for humanity to dwell  within, and still live in harmony? I could go on and on, but I won’t. I’ll leave that to all the profoundly smart thinkers out there who believe they have all the answers.

For now, I just know that I enjoyed this story. Reading the account of these characters through a series of letters was strange and enlightening all at once. It allows the reader a chance to experiences different points of view, but can also have the effect of being indecisive and confusing. However, in this story, the confusion is a good thing. If you read this story with a full and complete understanding of every thought and emotion expressed, then you are truly an evolved person and should go ahead and ascend into the heavens. I kid, but seriously, this is not a clear case to understand: mentally, physically, or spiritually. If anything, this story excels at leaving the reader with questions of why, how, and what about me?

I’d recommend this story to anyone who appreciates classical literature, sci-fi, and thought-provoking stories that question the nature of humanity.

This review has been posted to GoodReads. If you’d like to obtain a copy of this book, try this link.

Thank you for taking the time to read this post. If you like it let me know and share it with others. See you next time, Toi Thomas. #thetoiboxofwords

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Books

Review: Pride and Prejudice

Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen

I give this book a 4.

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This is a story that I thought that I’d already read. I have read other Austen books in the past and since so many people talk about this book, I guess I just felt that I’d already read it. I even thought maybe I saw a film adaptation of it and that was the reason I hadn’t read it. Going back and truly thinking about it, I realized that I had made it to the ripe old age of, none of your business, without reading this book and then decided to rectify that.

When I started reading the book I remembered why I hadn’t read it in the past. I read Sense and Sensibility in high school and it was a really tough read for me. The language is almost Shakespearean but not so poetic, and the conversation are more humorous. I quickly remembered that back then I was not much of a fan of Elizabethan culture and I’m still not, but this is still a good story.

It doesn’t take too much imagination to get to the core of this book’s overall message and apply it to modern times, thus the title. This book is the perfect example of how pride, perceived pride, jealousy, prejudice, stereotypes, and so much more are a part of our everyday lives and how they can twist things about so innocently, and not so innocently.

Since I read mostly fantasy and sci-fi, my classic literature muscles were strained when reading this, but it was a good strain. Austen’s creativity is obvious and the amount of emotion she is able to express is astounding. Always one to consider the high and low points of social interaction, I found the ideas of etiquette in this story to be quite amusing.

I wish there was more I could say, but I am at a loss for words. This is an excellent story and one I feel more young people should read or maybe even be used as a tool to explain the pros and cons of social etiquette. I must, however, admit that I prefer reading a more modern vernacular. For that reason, I can’t say that I love this book, but I do really like it.

This review has been posted to GoodReads. If you’d like to obtain a copy of this book, try this link.

Thank you for taking the time to read this post. If you like it let me know and share it with others. See you next time, Toi Thomas. #thetoiboxofwords