Category: About Toi

 

A Mrs. Loving Reflection

 

I didn’t know it would be like this. When I got married, I thought it would be like a fairy tale, but it was more of a nightmare. We got all dressed up, packed up, and headed out of town. I thought it was all part of the adventure. Course, I later found out that we had been on the run the whole time.

 

I didn’t know, or perhaps just didn’t quite understand, that it was illegal to marry somebody you loved if they didn’t have the same skin color as you. I sit here now, in reflection, thinking about all that happened, and I can’t believe it all started with a simple kiss.

 

He and I had been friends for a long time- since I was a little girl. When we started dating, it felt weird at first, but also kind of natural. Well then, you know how things are. One thing led to another, I was in a way, and he’d been saying for a while he wanted to marry me.  Daddy and momma seemed like they didn’t mind at all, invited him right on into the house, and then we started making plans.

 

After everything was all set, we headed out for our adventure. I thought that was the start of something wonderful. Then, we tried to go back home. I say try because we were stopped. The authorities were waiting for us like it was some kind of holiday. They arrested us, told us we were wrong, and sent us on our way. Our choices, a year in prison or never go home again.

 

To this day I just don’t get it. Why would the punishment for marrying someone other people don’t want you to be with be prison and not something else, anything else? I mean it’s prison or marriage. If I married a tree, would the tree have to do a year inside as well? They tried to claim that the law was just and fair because both parties (guess they meant me and him) got the same punishment despite the difference in our skin color. It still didn’t make sense to me why marriage, in general, was something that could be punished, but I guess that’s the world we were living in.

 

So, we left home. We did the best we could do, but it was just too much. We couldn’t travel together to go see family, it was making things difficult for keeping up with bills, and then there was the kids. So, we decided to fight it.

 

It was a long battle. I think the thing that still sticks with me, after all this time, aside from the whole prison thing, was that the lawyers didn’t even want me to say I was black. Seemed ridiculous to me, but they thought we’d have a better chance if I identified as a Native person. I don’t see how that made a difference, but they sure thought it might. In the end, though, a black woman got to keep the man she loves and we both got to keep our freedom.

 

So, I guess we won. The world isn’t as great a place as it could be, but it seems to be getting better. We got to be together and we got to go home. This has not been a fairy tale, but, I guess, in the long run, it could have been a much worse nightmare. After all, I’m blessed to have the man I love, wonderful children, and my health. Looking back, I still can’t believe this all started with a simple kiss.

 

A “fictionalized first-person” account summation of the Loving v. Virginia 1967 Supreme Court ruling. Click the Loving image up top to learn more about the case.

 

FCA- 626 words- A Mrs. Loving Reflection 2021 Copyright © Toinette J. Thomas

 

Join me on June 12 to celebrate Loving Day! This is a day to celebrate the right to marry anyone you want no matter what anyone else thinks about it (including me). Celebrate Loving Day to honor the right to love… In case you didn’t know, that’s me and my hubby up at the very top. It’s an old picture but still very much us and in love.

 

Please visit other entries in this hop and enjoy some funny, scary, touching, and thought-provoking stories. You’ll be so glad you did.

Thank you for taking the time to read this post. If you like it let me know and share it with others. See you next time, Toi Thomas. #thetoiboxofwords #blacklivesmatter